Listening to the GrassHoper : As if, i didn know that!!!

February 6, 2010 2 comments

A Masterpiece??? Read and decide

After the award winning “The God of Small Things” from the Socialist cum writer, it was a different side to see which was there in “Belly of The Beast” and with the “Algebra of Infinite Justice” the democratic calculations of additions and subtractions were again out in the open. With “Listening to the Grasshopper” , Arundhati Roy  immensely focuses on the terms like genocide and bigotry , redefining them so as to make them understandable for the people which don’t often encounter such terms in their daily course. Terms like these which have marked their presence in history, with a bloody stain still waiting to be washed.
Listening to the Grasshopper underlines the inconsistencies in the largest democracies of the world, and makes the general public aware (if they aren’t till date!!!) of what lies underneath the blooming flowers. The more than obvious attitude of any Indian blaming the in power government (who cares what the opposition says isn’t it) is the idea behind this book , and is also the  kind of  attitude the author is trying to change. It may appear that the author is an upcoming ticket holder from the Mighty Congress, but the book is as real as anything on politics would ever get. By again and again redefining the term democracy, the literary powers of the author have grown to such an extent and he can delude the readers from the fundamental meaning of the term.
If you know a historian, than do sit with him sometimes for a cup of coffee and he will tell you, that this mighty big nation has innumerable instances where the basic reason for its very existence were defied and debated upon, but he will also tell you that the nation still stands. Even if it does not hold its head high, it still pretends to do so and with a hell lot of accuracy. JAI HO

Categories: Uncategorized

The Associate : Who wants to be a Lawyer?

September 30, 2009 Leave a comment
No one is bigger & hotter than the Law

No one is bigger & hotter than the Law

After reading this one, i am warning every lawyer at our good old uncle sam’s state, watch your back dude, m cuming for you with my stun gun and butterfly knife, m short of pocket money. Have you ever witnessed a case when an engineer whose just 2 years short(hopefully) of earning his first graduate degree, suddenly out of nowhere sais ‘Damn yaaar, chose the wrong option, i even liked black’.  If you havent, then m lettin out a lil secret, I am one.
The cover itself depicts, that these son of …(chalo leave it, i might get sued for that) earn so much, that every dog of the alley is just after them. This here , is quite an intiriguin piece of art,by the famous ‘The’ fame (you’ll notice he has a lot of ‘The’s’ in his titles) Mr Grisham. Now, its seems like its not only our titsy bitsy Mr Johar bettin his little pocket money on K’s nd stuff, or our Tilak Queen, Ms Unity but the world if quite full of such philosophers.
So it’s a deadly game of blackmail, nd there playin with him, and our hero here is quite a player himself ;), you know what i mean. So it goes somethin like this, our little kid over here, did what people normally do in their school life(not in hindustan i mean), smoke pot, booze parties, girls nd all their hoppin activities. And suddenly in one of their small get togethers, a bang happens. A girl, who eats less and sleeps more ( with some one else that is)  gets nailed..nthinn unsual about that hun…ofcourse their is..she’s  raped guys(Scream). And guess who the couched belonged too…guess guess, our little hero over here aur kaun. But time moves on, people forget and they also move ON. After a while the hero suddenly reads somethinn like this ‘Satuatory Warning : Ciggratte Smokin is INjurious to health’ and he decided to be the good old Mama’s boy. Gets into the the top most law college in the world, and is one of those…top performers every firm has an eye on. To pay him somethinn in like 7 figures and earn in like what..10 no 11 figures. But, he wants to a samaj sevak BUT ( and a big one ie) we don want that do we, cummon we’re payin Rs 250 fr this, samaj sewaks don get hot,fair,sexy girls (Kamineys are exceptions). The girl is with rich, slogging, smart, Yale graduate. So, now we have the Ganda Uncle enter, with his little reviving the past session, he gets our Hero do what he wants him to do. Sell hot dogs, at a ever low price, at wall street, and try listening to lawyer chat, and pass confidential info, or at least somethinn like it.
In the whole journey, our hero here acts like a hero, thinks like a hero, sleeps like hero (oops..sry) and wins like a hero. Nothinn which is happening for the first time, and certainly..certainly not for the last time.
The book cannot be termed as a page turner but is just a lil time pass entertainer. A paisa hindustanin bhasa..provided your buyin it from one of those red light book sellers. And if not ..the sorry fellas.i think the girl friends’s waitin and there’s a spot at CCD just about to get filled. After all we are not like our hero over here..who’s paid for everythinn he does from bathing to dating.
I wish i had been a lawyer, wud’ve sued my self for writin this crap..but isnt this a democracy were living in 😉

The White Tiger : Out of the Cage, Into the Hearts

September 13, 2009 Leave a comment
Hilarious Murder ,not a mystery

Hilarious Murder ,not a mystery

Helloo all, finally we have nabbed the tiger just on the way to the deep dark jungles. After hunting for years, our virtuosic tiger over here (aka Mr Adiga) has his mouth full of a long shiny trophy, a booker prize (loud applause). The jury was laughing there ass off, and here he was, our hilarious Mr Adiga,a true son of the motherland, standing on stage, and wavin his shiny souvenir like one of those hand fans you can find in a dingy at Pallika Bazaar, New Delhi, ‘JAI HO’.
One of the most hilarious sarcasms i’ve ever witnessed, he was even more funny than my padosi aunty, weighing about a ton, and has this obvious India Aunty nature, of peepin whenver a long sedan stops in front of the house. Then she goes back in, where there is our 20 kg uncle, ‘Bahar vekh khotte, lambi gaddi, kabhi tere pyon ne bhi vekhi hain’. JAI HO.
Now, since my padosi aunty is not our subject today, let us talk about  our little animal over here. Our Hero of the story is a small town kid, big town dreams living near Ganga Kinaare. Now u’ll not find many indians who hate the holy ganga, i know that  every thing under the sun is being dumped in it thesa days, but c’mon man, it is ganga we are talkin bout.
He mentions all this in a 500 page love  letter (sigh) to a small thinga chinky, Mr somethinn ‘ooo’  this big time babbuu in a chinii sarkar. I guess Mr Adiga predicted the future, we don want our brothers from another mother to get angry do we. 😉 JAI HO.
So, this small town kid, whose fascinated with a conductor’s dress and a whistle, had a lot of brains, was a first class student in school. The school is the place in the book where you come to know why the book is named what it is named. In a village , what all do we find,1. A kuan,2. Kuan ke pass Ladkiyan, 3. Ladkyon ke pass Zamindar, 4. Zamindar ke pass Zamin, & 5. Zamin ke pass fir kuan. So it all goes round nd round, chukki peeesing & Peesing. The absolute elegance of mentioning the Landlords was the 2nd best part ,the 1st best being Pinky Madam( don worry people,well come to it) . The hero, learns to drive, and guess what he becomes 😉 a driver. Son of a rickshaw puller, behind the wheel of an expensive sedan, now this is called kismat ke karvat. And when your driving down  NRI with his NRI wife then, thazz kismat ki badi karvat. Slowly and slowly, they seem to like their new driver and some judagd here, and some jugad there our hero enters the big city. Apni Dillli. From the village roads with Khaddas,the hero’s drivin on the roads of delhi with bigger khaddas(its rainning these days you know). JAI HO
And when the hero was getting accustomed to the round nd round flyover, the malik here was learning how to oil the indian machinery, even that oil is adulterated. The zoo family here ( you’ll know when you read it) is doin this kala dhanda of coal and all. And since in this holy motherland of ours, everything starts and ends at Delhi, so here we are an NRI with his NRI wife and his non-NRI driver in a Metro (full of Metropolitans).Even the driver her is discovering something, discovering the DEEP dark secrets of this HARDworking city. He’s discovering himself , his desires, his senses and his hopes and his dreams. And is suddenly starting to notice his NRI’s Bosse’s NRI wife, a little closely than he used too. Pinky Madam, the typical mall going, slum hating, disco dancing, skirt wearing, drunk driving, man hitting , divorcing husband, kinda lady. With qualifications like that, even the big seths would fall for her, then why not our bhola babu here.
The books goes at those tickly spots, and makes you laugh until your stomach hurts. With sheer elegance, and direct sensibl sarcasm the author tries to tell you somthing, and doesnt bore you. He points towards those innumerable hindu deities keepin intact the affection and respect. The protagonist would appear to be the hero throuh whole of the book, you can get a lil drifted in the middle, but this is Hindustan, heroes live hero, die hero, walk hero, and talk hero.

Hart’s War : The Ball is in Your COURT

September 6, 2009 Leave a comment
An Exciting Courtroom of a kind

An Exciting Courtroom of a kind

Hola!! People…Back after a long time are we ;). If your thinking why i wasnt bloggin for a long time, please tell me if you get it, coz i’ve been thinking the same thing. Well now i’ve stopped thinking and maybe thazz the reason i am  back on my normal routine of giving my KeyBoard a hell of a bad time. Just think about it, how would you feel when some lousy lazy lethargic lad pokin you through out the day, and you don even have a mouth to say “Watch where you pokin you dumbass”.
 Moving on with our little book over here, heres a book that gives you one of the most intriguing courtroom drama ever written. Mr Katzenbach ( srry if i spelled it wrong) had to have a lot of coffee sessions with a man of law, coz as they say ‘A Lot can happen over coffee’, i wonder who payed the bill coz i’ve never seen a lawyer paying just seen them suing (bad one..i know)
Now, here we are in the middle of nowhere with a bunch of good old Uncle Sam’s EMPLOYEES who were just doin there normal chores (choppin heads, stabbing the torso, killing, beheading nd stuff) when they were nabbed by the very calm and composed German Breed. Who just have there own way to say “You’ve done some naughty things kid, now it’s snoozing time” (translated in german).
All the POW ( pissed off warriors, or was it Prisoners of War) were in a POW camp carrying out their Normal POW activites in a POW kinda way. Washing, eating, beating, sneezing and all the ings one can think of ( except girls there you see).They had all what they needed, a 46 inch plasma, a PS3, a sexily dressed waitress in order to SERVE them, a multicuisine Menu,a pool table, a swimmin pool and the whole shabang.Hehehe..i got you there didnt I. They are POWs guys not me (;))
The guys out there made innumerable attempts to smell the free air which reminded me of Chicken Run. And guess what we even had a MAJDOOR UNION, to validate and implement the escaping plans & also to offer a not-very-persuasive testimony incase the good guys didnt make it.
And then…whoa a guy gets killed in the looo…guess just couldnt handle the PRESSURE. And the white guys did what they do best, GET THE BLACK MAN or the monotonous THE BLACK MAN DID IT. I don blame them, if i had as intense an appearance as he did, i wouldve hanged my self. Now,,i don rememeber who came with the out-of-the-box advice but it sure did make an impact. And then inspite of all the ODDS (nd evens) we have a Criminal Trial in a POW Camp.
Oops..i forgot our HERO, the guy on the cover, Mr Hart. An aspiring law student ( with a story of his own of why he’s advocating in a POW camp) who just fell in love with the black guy (i did say no girls didnt i) and thinks no…its not the Black this time. So he carries out a typical homicide investigation, and in a place deprived of the essentials, he gets hold of a camera(hahaha) and has his own post mortem thing goin as fast as ferrari.
In the middle of all this, we have Hitler’s Brother from a another mother, the guy with just one  hand (poor guy ;)), who was just masquerading around. But he had the Dabar Lal Dant Manjan teeth you know, even our little budding lawyer would seem to agree with it.
So filled with all the twists and tweaks, with all the ORDER ORDER, MY LORD,AADRNIYA JUDGE MAHODAY and that kinda stuff we have in our hand a very heavy,very long Hart’s War.
If your not much of reader, just like me 😉 than can see the movie Hart’s War, starring Bruce Willis.
P.S.: A must have for lawyers (i think),
For Lawyers : Don charge me for the advice please 😉
Categories: Book Review

Anything For You Ma’am : Imaginary Romance

August 24, 2009 3 comments
Would force you to fall in love

Would force you to fall in love

Hey all, so again we have one of those love stories from another new kid on the block. All the love stories written by Hindustanis are indeed impeccable, coz we provide the reader with the real picture inspite of just dazzling them away. All that glitters is not gold, but is hell expensive these days. The book would touch you at those untouched places, and would also force you to be in love. And would also clear some myths like IITian just have brains , nope they do have a heart aswell and when they use it, they bloody well excel in that aswell.
So, as the title depicts, it is the love story of an IITian (Human Beings type). The title forced me to think that it’s just one of those books in which a student hits on his young & sexy teacher, but fortunately its not. Idealism is like a home made recipe for Desi authors, something which is tough to attain, is not tough to sell when you right about it.
‘Jaisa ki maine kaha tha’, make them curious, and you can even sell them your used clothes at the price of new.
The book has our IIT brainy, who is a champion flirto (Champion because, he goes beyond than just flirting)  and hits or tries to hit on his sisters friend. One of the many advantages of having a sister, the chances get increased ( but if you have a sis like me, then your on your own kiddo), then you’ll not mind sparin a few extra bucks on rakhi and Bhai dooj . I wonder where did they come from, easy money guys.
So our JUGADOO who loves to read (like me), is good in talking ( like me) and can play a guitar( not like me) has everything what a girl would want(like me). The guy can sing, talk, think, and say i love you a million times a day.An Adarsh Boy Friend.
But KNOCK KNOCK!!! problem guys, this here is a Long Distance Relationship, poor fellow , STD all the time, i can understand. So since our guys is just sick of spending double the money on just talking ( no naughty stuff, this time its clean), he puts into use , that bada IIT dimag of his, and makes a Yojana to meet his PREM KANYA(Love girl). Oh did i mention another love scene , its the teacher who loves his bull (hahaha) not the SAAND yaar, its BioBull. A kinda Bus which runs on some cheap fuel.
The Books filled with too many (and i mean too many) coincidences. I mean okay, you meet your fathers friend in some distant Sheher, acceptable, but you on a train, with your girls JEJA, and your ADHYAPAK, thazz the bloody limit.
But its a book, and all characters in this book are fictitious, and any resemblance to any living thing or matter would be pure coincidental.:P
Nice work done Mr Raheja, not bad for a debut, and also not a bad buy for 100 bucks. Gimme 30 on every book and every day i’ll blog bout your book, filled with heavy and nice sounding adjectives

All in all, the books nice, fun to read. I am sure you’ll want to fall in love after that, you’ll have that tingly feeling and for the next few days every girl in town would appear to be your true love.

But as i said, everything that glitters is not gold, but its hell expensive 😉

The Hades Factor : When the world got Covert.

August 23, 2009 Leave a comment
A Thriller with all the Bang Bang

A Thriller with all the Bang Bang

This would be the most absurd order you must’ve witnessed. But its not my fault, its just that i saw Cassandra Compact before i read about Hades Factor (mentioned in Cassandra Compact). This book also deals with some deadly disease which if not checked would destroy the human race (wow, how creative) now now, i know you might be saying ” Kya Yaar,Phir woi baat”, my grandpa used to say it all the time, even when i was saying it for the first time. It took me a lot of time to understand that its just his age, until i understood that, we were fighting almost everyday.
Its nice that no one in the Indian Pharmacy world has read this book, coz if they would’ve, most of them would get listed above Bill Gates in terms of money and above Sonia Gandhi for power (Check out this years Forbes List).
I really regret the fact that i am not writing about the new hot dish on the table these days,its ironic that every dog on the block is pretending to have a mouthfull of that and then just barking in every alley , commenting that it had too much meat. DAMN..
All this happens in Hindustan Only. If its still getting tough to guess the recipe, lemme give it you. Take a pan, pour some home made RSS Oil, cut the BJP in small pieces, Grind JINNAH,NEHRU,& Sardar Patel , Fry Them all together and just Sprinkle some of JASWANT SINGH over it and walla, here we are, the very new BJP DO PYAJA.
Its a big godamn book you know, and i am an Engineering Student so, it’ll not take me much time to complete it since i have all the vella time in the world.
So Now, comming back to our Italian Pasta overhere, the book starts with the JANTA vomiting blood in various parts of the world and the eventually getting dead and all in one of the most scariest of ways. Also our Munda in this tale is the same doctor-karate kid guy as mentioned in cassandra compact. But he’s not the saddy saddy this time, you know why, coz he has his girl. And then we have Mr Ludlum’s style of describing the Feminine Species and he does not disappoint us at all. With utter perfection and finesse he makes us marvel his elegance and art. So both the wouldbe’s are doctors in some big time Government thing under the square (square????…ooops the PENTAGON).
So when the government is running out of mortuaries to fill, the big Bhaiyas of the pentagon start getting their pants wet, and thus prepare a special team to help them dry it.
In the mean time our Lovebirds are just having a nice little cosy time in their  hotel room with wine and stuff, just talking i presume. When they are done with their KABADDI thing , the girl has to go, dont get carried away people, they were there for a conference. And our Munda here is just called in the park in night ,no he’s not 2 timing its just that he needs to warned by his SHUBH CHINTAK something like ” Unko pata Chal gaya hain, bhago jaan bachake” kinda shit.
And please put your hands together for…you know who the Ganda Admee, remember that we are in a world where “Ek ki taklif, dusre ka fayda” , want me to probs it means if somebodies about to get screwed, there’s this someone selling the screwdriver. The question is was he/she about to get screwed just because someone is selling the screwdriver, or their getting screwed coz they’ve already bought it.
The Book is filled with all the answers. The Iraq errand, the bouncing cars, girl friend’s murder, a deadly profit chart,
an ex intelligence officer, a genius ecliptic hacker and our very own Karate kid.
Together they show you, all what you wanna witness and experience.

Sometimes making money doesnot remain same as earning it.. 😉

The Cassandra Compact : Emotional Adventure

August 17, 2009 Leave a comment
A medical mystery, tragedy & jeopardy

A medical mystery, tragedy & jeopardy

This ones new, unique, interesting and above all from an author whom I didn’t know much, but after reading this, really got addicted to his work. Mr Ludlum, remember our old Neck Breaking, Nice Looking Jason Bourne. The nice little calm kid was a figment of Mr Ludlum’s imagination.
Now, I won’t deny the fact that i bought the book coz it had a nice cover, was looking heavy, and i was getting it cheap.Not many would read an author they haven’t heard of, most would even not know anybody except their usual Family Authors (Read through generations). Don’t take it as a shock,  but many of my old pals who call themselves ‘Reader’ ( In what sense, i am still solving that puzzle) think its only Madam Christie who WRITES, some think of our own small town Kid Mr Bhagat to be the only author with a mischievous touch, some think Arundhati Roy is the only one who writes with a dictionary placed next to her. What we need to know is that the world is way bigger than that,so one should not feel shy about experimenting ( with books & authors) so as to know about the different styles that can be there, and the different styles which were meant to be there….
So now we move on this little story over here, what Mr Ludlum knew and maybe was the first one to realize that involving (or blaming) the agencies like CIA,NSA,MI6 and all, was as common as  having a girl friend (i dont wish to tease all those who are single ;)) and dared to try something new, The Covert One   another one of those ‘barely there’ organizations , answerable to noone, was funded like anything, and also had smarter suites (Armaani I guess). So the man in the Picture is Mr John Smith,a supposed -to-be-a-doctor kinda guy who was also given martial arts lesson in his medical school, not very much like our medical schools where Martial Arts is DOOR KI BAAT, medical lessons are something uncommon (;)). So he is this fit fat dude, with blue eyes and stuff working for the Covert Organization covertly.
Now unlike many action or rather fiction novels i’ve read so far, this is the first one where the HERO is made to cry ‘ Lost your little girl there ,haaan kid’ . Our guy here is extremely emotional, not the usual DEVDAS LOUNDA,but something like a ZAKHMI SHER ‘Don you mess with me bad boys’.
When i was reading the book, what i discovered that the ‘Hades Tragedy’ was often mentioned, and then i just slapped my head ‘ Damn man, reading the 2nd in the series before the first, Hindustan Zindabad’. But inspite of that, was able to undertstand the whole mess easily, and ‘Hindustan Zindabad’ again.
So our guy is filled with it all anger,hate,depression, so u’ll find all the rona dhona stuff coupled with a unique style of narration. The protagonist in our little story over here is your usual, SRK and Hrithik Mixture.
The story involves the Soviet Union, and the deadly smallpox (it may sound stupid, but it wass deadly) which was stolen,i guess the thief didnt know that ‘Chori karna buri baat hain’. When the story unfolds our guy here has this strong evidence against these BADA BABUS ( aka government employees) at the top and also some money dreaming private big fish (They’re every where man) whose just in a mood to kill a couple of people, inorder to afford his ‘2 waqt ka butter chicken’ ,bloody self-centered pig.
Also in the story we have (My Favourite) Peter Howell (No, he’s not a Dog) your usual play-calm and shoot them in the head kinda guys. Who knows everything about the agencies deep dark secrets, and is present almost everywhere.
The tale would dazzle those pure’ Mar Dhad’ lovers and make you say ‘Awww poor kid’ and in the very next page ‘ Atta Boy’ or ‘Go for them tiger’.
So the book is nice a real page turner but dont fool around like me and read ‘The Hades Factor’ first.
‘Tab tak ke liye, Namaskar’ TING!!!1